iPatent

March 16th, 2010

I love Apple (I guess when I say that, people think of a Technology company more than the actual fruit), you guessed it, the technology company, precisely incorporation. The first reason is that they invented a very sophisticated toy called ‘iPhone’ which has changed the way people communicate with each other. Pre-iPhone days, we used to talk over phone, now we are busy browsing and playing with ‘Apps’. The iPhone was built anyway for non-conversational purpose as the call drop rate beats my son’s mathematical capabilities.

Secondly, they recently filed law suit over HTC for violating their patents which gave me an idea for patenting my stuff. So briefly iPatent..

  1. The lane that iDrive when I commute to my office between 8:45 am and 9:00 am.
  2. The 2nd bowl in my office restroom where iNormally piss.
  3. The coffee flavor iDrink everyday at the office from the upper second bin in the pantry.
  4. The direction iLook at my monitor day in and day out in the office.
  5. iCan’t list everything in here you see, they run into millions.

Anyway, anyone who are breach of one or more of the above patents are liable for facing iLaw suits and they will be punished to the fullest extent of the law.

I also thank Apple for teaching me how to do Product upgrades, for example.

  1. iPhone
  2. iPhone 3G
  3. iPhone 3GS
  4. iPhone 3GSF (that F is the flash that they are going to include in their 4th generation iPhone).
  5. iPhone 3GSFB (you can also get an iPhone in ‘Blue’ starting from 5th generation iPhone).
  6. iPhone 3GSFB* (they thought that having too many letter might backfire their marketing campaign, so it might well be i2Phone, which means, you are allowed to make calls from now)

Cut Copy & Paste

November 12th, 2009

Wondering myself as to why I am writing this? Sometimes, egological influences act upon us and condemn the good and brings out aggression of uselessness (pretty strong sentence, ha!). In simple terms, something goes in our mind and we are stuck to that as a chewed bubblegum in a church seat, and we refuse to come to terms to reality. How often do we come across this situation, oh aplenty.

Vivekananda had given a single sentence truth behind human miseries, I would say single word, “OTHERS”. Although plural, single does that trick. Anyway, our post-cricket discussions have been mainly confined to 3 things lately, Sachin Tendulkar, iPhone Vs Droid and tickers. I would say that we can also add little pornography to that list, but its more on confrontational side than discussion. Coming to the point, this brief essay is about “cut, copy & paste”.

Whether we like or not, we often do things in CCP mode a.k.a. cut, copy & paste. Most people buy houses because their dear and near did, of course we always have our own justifications, adding more hippocracy. We buy cars like OTHERS, and its a CCP. We buy electronic like others, another CCP. And interestingly, phones have joined this bandwagon, more so, the famous iPhone. A single known human gadget exorbitant in all aspects and widely considered a must have. Of late, there were so called iPhone killers, destroyers, masters and what not and technology websites have forgot what to publish and just concentrate on this feast. Droid’s entry was more dramatic and looks like a REPLY to iPhone (REPLY is to satisfy again the egology).

Like any other fool, I spent time in analyzing what is best and what is not, even indulged in heated conversations during our post-cricket marathons. Experts had excerpts and technological buffs and iPhone lovers had their defenses and offenses. It all came to one final point, usability.

Now they are quite a peers with respect to everything, but somehow iPhone is adjudged the WINNER, always (way to go iPhone geeks). However, one point that all ignore at the end of the day is they all knew that the iPhone’s call quality is so poor that you better go to the person whom you want to talk to than call him/her over. Anyway, I leave that to the geeks and lovers.

But, isn’t a phone created to call? OR AM I STUPPID ?@#*!?!

So all the CCPs out their, I congratulate you on getting a new or old iPhone to have fall in love with those apps out there. There are close to 1200 calculator apps and you NEED all of them, right?

Last but not least, I saw an iPhone app, which is a cigarette lighter and gets lit when you shake your iPhone. Now that’s more CCP for you.

Ooops! Last but least, I am an AT&T customer.