Joke of the year :) :) :)

July 24th, 2009

No prizes for guessing what it is! I know most of you would come up with the same one (without blinking). So here it goes..

“The Andhra Pradesh State’s FY ’09-’10 Budget”

Told ya! no prizes for guessing.

Anyway, the story goes like this (all figures in Crores)…

  1. Total Budge 103,485.33 (Anything after the decimal is considered missinglenous).
  2. Planned Expenditure 40,184.11
  3. Un-Planned Expenditure 63,301.22 (Again, please do not guess!)
  4. Free electricity increased to 9 hours from 7 hours (8 out of those 9 hours fall into power-cut zone)
  5. Rs.2 Kg rice quota increased to 6 Kg from 4 Kg (expect 20% increase in contaminates)
  6. Electricity Subsidies increased to 6,040 (the meter runs on battery during power cuts and the money? no guesses again!)
  7. Sorry! you cannot get more laughs for free.

Seriously missing stuff from the AP Budget.

  1. No ‘official’ funds allocated to Sakshi News Paper.
  2. Not all mining is owned by the CM’s family members.
  3. Out of every Re.1 Govt. is still spending 2 paise for the public. Politicians are only getting 98 paise, this should be raised to Re.1
  4. No new irrigation project funding where there is no water.
  5. All drinking water (already polluted) should be free.
  6. No new taxes for saying ‘dog’ (Dog owners are already fined Rs.1,000/dog).

The bestowed financial minister of the State cannot be more ill-qualified than Paris Hilton running for US presidency. Poor guy, he is almost illiterate and you are asking economic questions, not fair!

Irrespective of how the supply and demand equations are, just because edible gram prices are up, all pulse’s prices went up. Onions are Rs.40/Kg, ban those f***ing vegetables, you are not privileged to eat them. Rice is Rs.40/Kg (I am talking about that the variety that humans can eat). Stop eating that calorie diet, be carnivorous.

The social status back in India is so low right now that pigs are on strike as often politicians are compared to them. Law and Order is a joke and the Judiciary system is still between Dwapara and Kaliyuga. Women are being publicly raped (the police are busy twittering and preparing MMS) and people are sentenced to death for drinking water (its so freaking polluted).

God bless India! (Ha! Ha! one more joke 🙂